I wrote this post a couple of weeks ago and never posted it.
Thought it was still share-worthy, so here goes!
.........
Yesterday, Makenzie had what may have been the most disappointing moment of her seven-year-old life.
The classroom spelling bee.
Why on Earth do we still do spelling bees?
Haven't we moved on from the age of classroom humiliation?
There can be only one winner, and 20-odd losers who feel like just that, a loser.
Makenzie is as smart as a whip and a complete and total bookworm.
Three weeks ago, her school issued a 100-book challenge to be completed by the end of the school year. She has already completed the challenge. In 3 weeks. She spells above grade level. She knows how to spell her spelling words long before they ever get sent home. So when we got the list of study words for the spelling bee, she already knew how to spell all of them. They were so easy for her, and I knew she stood a pretty good chance of winning the thing.
I practiced with her anyway, and so did Justin.
One day last week, Justin read one of the words to her.
"Jet," he said.
Makenzie, answering in the spelling bee format Justin taught her, said, "Jet. G-e-t. Jet"
"You said G," Justin replied.
"Ohhhh, J, I meant to say J!" she answered back.
I know if she had been writing, she would have written J, but for some reason she was just saying G.
It was one of the easiest words, and it was the only word I remember her missing on the entire list.
So yesterday, when they all lined up in the hall for the spelling bee, Makenzie was third to go.
Her word?
You guessed it.
Jet.
Can you even believe it?
And she made the same nonsense error as before.
And she was out.
The first one out.
She had to go sit by herself in the classroom, while the rest of the class went round after round spelling the words correctly. She said it wasn't until the third or fourth word that other kids started getting out.
She was absolutely devastated.
I picked her up from the bus stop and when I asked her how school was, she made the saddest face.
She didn't answer and just started crying.
Finally she just cried out, "I lost the spelling bee, I was the first one! I thought my teacher said "get," not "jet!" and just sobbed. Like total, uncontrollable sobbing. It was SO so sad. I knew the same thing had happened from when Justin practiced with her, but she was saying she thought the teacher said "get" because she was embarrassed that she misspelled such an easy word.
My heart just ached.
"Ooohh, Kenz, I am sooo sorry! It's okay!"
"It's not okay!!" she screamed out.
Now she was angry.
She cried and cried, and nothing I said could help. She just needed a good cry.
Jarom and Kyle were totally perplexed about what was going on.
She kept crying out things like, "I'm never doing another spelling bee again!" and "I don't want to go back to school!"
This is not normal behavior from Makenzie.
She is the most flexible little girl who gets over things really quickly (I love that about her). So I knew she wasn't just being dramatic, she really felt that way, and I understood. She was embarrassed, deflated, and utterly disappointed.
But after we got some food in her system (Justin got home soon after and had a total saving grace: a chocolate cupcake with pretty red frosting, which did wonders for her mood), we talked it out. Justin has a talent for knowing just what to say to make someone feel better. He told her that she was so smart, and everyone knows that, and that everybody has an off day once in a while. Today was just an off day. You're still the same, smart Makenzie that left for school this morning, and you'll be the same, smart Makenzie when you go to school tomorrow. You just keep trying, and don't let this get the best of you. That was kind of the gist of it. And she took it to heart. I could see her thinking about it. We gave her some time to get over it, and about an hour later, she was her happy old self again.
She told me, "Okay, I'll do the spelling bee again, but if I don't win by third grade, I am NOT doing it in fourth."
Haha, she is a trip. She finally decided she would keep trying.
It was really hard as a parent to see your child so... sad.
But I know it was just one of life's disappointments and she will have plenty more to come.
I told her that sometimes we have to go through hard things so we can learn how to be more compassionate toward other people when they go through hard things- that now when someone else loses something, she'll know how they feel and be more understanding. She nodded her head in absolute agreement.
And one thing's for sure: she will never, ever spell the word "jet" wrong again.
Love this little girl so much!
